Midnight Ponderings
by Pardryll
Summary: Kuwabara talking about how the guys' jibes really cut into him. Firstperson. My first serious fic. Chapters 2 and 3 now finished!
1. Midnight Ponderings

Ohayou, and all others who happen by my story! I am Neko-tsuin, and this is my first -serious- fanfiction. bows Before I do anything else, I feel obliged to inform you, this is a first-person Kuwabara fanfiction. Also, the disclaimer: I own nothing of Yu Yu Hakusho except the first two mangas over here on my bookshelf. That being said, I don't own Kuwabara, either, or Eikichi. I also don't own Eris Bueller, the human-turned-phoenix-demon from Nefus de Twilight's A Rose Turned Real and Here At My Side. I just own this sad little story. Pity, ne? Well, on with the show!

I lay on my bed, Eikichi curled up and purring on my chest. My brow furrowed in thought as I went over the events of the day. Everybody was ragging on me today: Genkai, Yuusuke, Hiei, hell, even sweet little Eris was in on it. I sighed, idly pettingthe cat as I did so.

Sure, I never was the brightest crayon in the box, but they didn't have to remind me every moment of the day. It really hurts, y'know? Everybody you consider a friend teasing you because you're the guy who's got more brawn than brains. Just imagine, for a second.

All day long, your closest buddies putting you down, just to get a rise out of you, then laughing when you fall for it. I just wish sometimes...that they'd try to see past the shell, past the facade, to the wounds their words inflicted, and see the gentle kitten hidden inside.

Yukina seems to be the only one who understands. But even she dosen't feel the searing pain of all the scorning. Just because a guy's a little lacking in the brains department. Another sigh, I rubbed Eikichi's ears softly. "When will they understand?" I asked myself. That seemed to be the main question. When would they look past the tundra and see the tiny plant trying to grow and blossom into a great flower?

Owari

Katsu: Wow...I dun good with this writer

Neko: Shut up. I'm the one who labored for all of who knows how long, trying to figure out how to _start _the dang thing! Read and review, folks, flames are welcome. Constructive criticism more than welcome. I need the tips. _rattles a tin cup_ Click the button on the bottom left corner! Also, sorry I went on a mini-rant before the story. Y'know, disclaimer and such.


	2. The Life of Death

Allright folks! I see I have at least ONE alert, so I thought that since I started it, I'd continue. This is Botan's chappie. Yukina also has one, but that's all for now. At least, it better be for the moment..._glares at Katsu_  
K: What'd I do!

Life of Death

POV: Botan

After sunset, I fly up on my oar. The cool night air calls me, reminds me of who I am, but at the same time it taunts me with the job I cannot escape. Most see me as a blue-haired, bubbly person, but it's the only way to keep my role as a ferry-girl of the River Styx from pulling me down.

As I soar higher, I see an owl, hunting for food. The owl is a small, brown one with a broad circular area around its eyes. It screeches softly, almost inaudibly, then dives for its meal. As I leave it behind, I stare up at the glowing, round, silver-white moon.

Leading the souls of the dead to the spirit world is no walk in the park, you see. Sometimes they're bound to a certain place by things that happened before death, sometimes at, or things to come. Sometimes they're simply not ready to be dead and refuse to acknowledge it.

Yuusuke and Kuwabara take me for granted, but there's a whole flood of souls on a daily basis, many of them were children. You would be surprised at exactly how many die before they get a chance to experience life at its fullest.

The saddest, by far, are the partial souls, those who have separated themselves in two, three, four, or more. This is how many people end up with split personalities, and it usually results from a traumatic event, experienced by a child or adolescent.

I see the sun on the horizon and turn back, my mind and heart freed, albeit temporarily from the burdens of being a ferry-girl, to face another day with Yuusuke, Kuwabara, and our friends.

_OWARI_

Questions, comments, reviews, constructive criticism, flames, and herring all welcome. _hums a few bars from Not Myself_


	3. Ice Dreams of Fire

Allright folks! Here's chapter three! If you have any suggestions about future chapters, lemme know!

Ice Dreams of Fire

POV: Yukina

I sit at the back of Genkai-sensei's temple, watching Botan fly off. It's strange, really, how my purpose has deviated from searching for my brother to helping these people. They have become like a family to me, this motley assortment of humans and demons. All except for Hiei-san, the fiery demon swordsman.

He stays away from me if he can.

I believe that he's accepted the fact that I am here to stay, but is not happy about it.

I have often wondered why he's like that, why he would rather I were someplace else. There are things about him that are so familiar, yet so foreign. I sometimes wonder…. if he could be my brother. He and I are as different as day and night.

But I am not completely oblivious to the way he protects me.

Kazuma-kun is an odd human. He and Yuusuke-kun are friends and rivals, but there also is something about the way Yuusuke-kun and Hiei-san treat him. It hurts him, you know. I can see it. Their taunting causes wounds, which even Genkai-sensei cannot heal. My thoughts linger on Kazuma-kun a moment more, then turn back to the others.

Botan-chan, the ferry-girl, is the strongest of them all. She has endured centuries, guiding souls of the dead to the spirit world, with a smile.

I would be hard-pressed to endure even a decade of that work. She and I, I believe, are kindred in a sense.

Now, looking up at the lightening sky, I see Botan-chan in the distance, returning to the temple and our mismatched group, to face another day. Not as an individual, but as a family. A family of humans, demons, and spirits, working together to protect human- and demon-kind from those who would destroy it.

_OWARI_

And by the way, this one took a whole month to finish. I forgot about it for a few weeks.

K: And then forgot about it for a few more..._kicks Neko_

AIIEEE!


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